Ten Reasons Why a Christmas Tree is Better Than a Man*

1. A Christmas tree knows that the angel always goes on top.
2. Once you spend enough time fiddling with its base, a Christmas tree always stands erect.
3. A Christmas tree knows it looks much better with a woman’s touch.
4. When you bring out the ornament box, a Christmas tree knows who really has the balls.
5. A Christmas tree is always the right fit, because you can assess the goods before bringing it home.
6. A Christmas tree never shrinks when it gets cold outside.
7. If you get tired of one of its limbs, you can just saw it off.
8. When the Christmas tree starts to lose its needles and get saggy, you can throw it out.
9. When you put your box underneath the tree, the Christmas tree doesn’t immediately try to open the package.
10. Because you’re in charge of decorating, you can ensure that the Christmas tree is always well hung.

* This doesn't mean men are no good (this disclainer ensures it's writter health)